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Post by Ursa on Aug 13, 2009 22:05:48 GMT -5
((OOC OR: I Passed Up the Chance to Talk to Iroh and Go Home to See Zuko Because....?)) "I," Ursa began darkly, "am an idiot." This wasn't the first time Lady Ursa had decided this. And, by the end of this journey, it probably wouldn't be the last. It had been weeks since the Comet. Weeks since she'd made the foolish decision to run from Iroh. She could be home by now, with her son, where she belonged. But no. Of course not.
Ursa was tired, her steps were slow, and somewhat labored. She was thirsty, water was quickly becoming a serious priority, above even sleep and food. Her mouth felt dry, and she continued to chew at her tongue. It felt swollen. She wondered if it really was, or if it was just an effect of dehydration.
There was a village nearby, Ursa recalled. Her only hope was to go there, and hope that it hadn't been destroyed by firebenders before (or during) the comet. She pressed on, doing her best to ignore her body's pleas for rest and food. It had been a long time since she'd had to ignore such things. She wasn't very good at it either. Her stomach growled loudly, and a corner of her mind kept trying to convince her to lie down and rest. But Ursa knew that that was a very, very bad idea. She pressed on, hoping that she had not misjudged the location of the village she sought.
And then Ursa saw the village. She would have smiled a little, were her condition not so deteriorated. She approached and was soon spotted by a girl of about 12 or so. Ursa came to a stop about three feet away from the girl, and she immediately wavered, nearly collapsing.
The girl spoke, but Ursa was unable to distinguish the word before collapsing onto the ground. The darkness was peaceful.
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Post by Ursa on Aug 13, 2009 22:23:16 GMT -5
"MAMA!" The girl screamed, as she watched the newcomer collapse. She darted forward, kneeling beside the fallen woman, turning her head towards the people who were coming, gathering around.
"What happened?"
"I don't know! She was walking towards me, then she stopped. I was asking her if she needed some water or something...and she collapsed." The girl's words were rapid, almost hysterical.
"Go find your brother, stay with him." The woman said calmly.
"Akiko, come here, you can stay with Celina and I, while mother sorts this out." A man from the crowd said, coming forward a little to lead the girl away. Akiko ran off with him.
"Kira, she's-" One of the men began.
"Likely fire nation, I know. And I don't care." The woman responded. She set to work silently. "Severely dehydrated..." Kira murmured to herself softly. "Bring me some water." It wasn't a request.
Within moments someone had brought a bucket with water in it, Kira nodded at them politely. She dipped her fingers in the water carefully, and then dripped the cool, clear liquid over the fallen woman's mouth. She repeated the process several times.
"I'm going to need some help moving her to my hut. Light as she is, I don't want to risk trying to move her alone."
One of the men came forward and lifted the form from the dusty earth. It was only moments before she was laid down on a mat inside one of the identical huts.
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Post by Ursa on Aug 13, 2009 23:14:07 GMT -5
It was hours before Ursa began to stir. Her head hurt, her body felt like it was a large bruise. Golden eyes flickered open, and she found herself staring at an unfamiliar ceiling. Where was she? How had she gotten here?
"I see you are awake." The voice was female, it came from no where, and everywhere. It made Ursa's head hurt more. She turned her head sharply to find a woman kneeling on the floor beside her.
"Yes, I am ... awake." Ursa's voice was strained, still rough. She swallowed hard.
"Would you like some water, stranger?"
Ursa nodded, "Yes, please." She accepted the cup from the woman without question, drinking the now lukewarm fluid. She was grateful for it.
"I think I deserve some answers." Kira said firmly, when Ursa was done.
"I agree, but may I have one first?" Ursa responded, slowly. She sat up a little, drawing her legs into a seated cross-legged position.
"Depends on the question."
"What is your name? I cannot thank you properly without it." Ursa responded politely.
"Kira."
"Thank you Lady Kira of the earth kingdom." Ursa said formally, bowing head and shoulders. Her hands positioned themselves habitually into the fire nation bow. She held that position for a moment before sitting up again. "Now ask your questions."
"Who are you?"
"Ursa of the Fire Nation." The woman responded, without batting an eye. Kira raised an eye brow delicately.
"You say it like you are proud." She said, sounding almost accusing.
"I am not ashamed of my bloodlines, but of the actions of our leaders." Ursa's words were calm, but there was a hint of challenge behind them.
"I see." There was a pause. "How did you end up here, Ursa?"
"I was living in Ba Sing Se, when the White Lotus liberated it. I left the city at the end of the battle. Mostly, I wandered. I ended up here." So, there were some serious missing details in Ursa's story, but what she told of it was still true.
Kira nodded, "I'm done for now." She said simply. "Would you like to rest more, or should I start dinner?" She sounded kind, not accusing nor angry.
Ursa contemplated both ideas for a moment. They both sounded like good ideas. "Um...food first, then rest...if you don't mind."
"I thought so, you relax a bit, Ursa, I'll be back in a bit." And Kira left, leaving Ursa in silence.
She is...different. Ursa thought after a moment.
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Post by Ursa on Aug 23, 2009 12:48:26 GMT -5
Ursa had eaten, and she had rested. It was dawn. Kira had convinced her to remain here for a few more days - to regain her strength. It had not been all that difficult to convince Ursa that she needed to mend a little from her ordeal, but she had refused to stay more than two days, saying only that she must reach her destination. When asked what this destination was, Ursa responded only the coast - without any further explanation.
With paper, ink and a brush it seemed that she would write something - perhaps a letter to where ever she was going. But after several hours of staring at the paper, it became clear that she would not find the words to write. What did you say to someone you hadn't seen nearly seven years? What did you say to the boy that you had abandoned when he was but a child - no matter your reasons? What could you say in those circumstances? She couldn't just introduce herself - she couldn't just jump into the explanation of her disappearance either.
Finally she gave up - be it her surroundings or the limitations of the written word, she couldn't come up with anything that she deemed "acceptable" to even complete, much less send. Once she had put those things away, Ursa found herself with nothing to do. It occurred to her that she could write to Iroh instead - it would be easier to speak with him, to receive advice in that manner. She resolved to do so, if no other idea came to her.
Ursa settled herself seiza on the floor facing the small window in the room. She closed her eyes, breathing slowly. With no candles to focus her attention on, she instead focused first on her heartbeat, once she was familiar with the sound, she ignored it completely to the point she didn't really hear it any more. Slowly she repeated the process with every sound first within her, then outside of her. Once this task was complete her turned her attention to the problems at hand, and meditated.
Ursa heard Kira (or maybe Akiko) come and stand in the door way, watching her for a time, though she gave no indication of this fact. She heard the girl (yes, apparently it was Akiko) whisper "What is she doing?" in a somewhat confused tone.
A tiny smile passed across her face, though as her back was turned to the door, the girl wouldn't see it. "I am meditating, young one," She said gently, opening her eyes and turning slightly to face Akiko.
"Can I join you?" The girl asked, sounding a little hopeful.
Ursa nodded, "Come here," She said motioning to a spot beside her.
Ursa spent the next hour teaching Akiko about meditation. Afterward, she released the girl-child, feeling content with herself. [image of person sitting seiza for those unfamiliar with the term. Ignore the chair-bench thing set over her legs, Ursa is sitting without it.]
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Post by Ursa on Sept 20, 2009 14:18:43 GMT -5
It was the morning that she intended to leave. She had eaten a good breakfast, and had supplies to last her a few days to the next village, if necessary. She paused before leaving to watch Akiko and some of the other children play. Ursa wasn't aware that her expression had changed as she watched the kids, not until Kira touched her arm.
"Are you alright?" She sounded concerned.
"I'm fine." Ursa said quietly after a moment, "I just...watching them reminds me of my own children." She admitted carefully. She didn't elaborate, instead she shook her head sharply "I should be leaving." She said simply before continuing on her way.
Biting at her lip, she wondered after her children again, as she escaped the outskirts of the village and continued on her way, towards the coast. The image of the children playing happily in the sun haunted her. She found herself wondering time and time again why she hadn't just gone to Iroh and Jeong-Jeong in Ba Sing Se. Why she had run away from them, why, even now she couldn't bring herself to write a little to someone to tell them that she was alive and wanted to see them, if they were willing.
Ursa noted a stand of trees off to the side. She approached them silently and sat down in the shade, back against one of them with her eyes closing against the tears that threatened to fall. He probably hates me. She thought bitterly, wrapping her arms around herself as the first silver tears slipped down her cheeks.
I abandoned him. He probably never wants to see me again. He's probably happy now, I shouldn't intrude. I shouldn't tear his life a part again. He might actually be happy...I shouldn't get involved. But... I can't not, can I? I can't...just stand by, and never say anything to him. Why is this so difficult?
Ursa drew her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, setting her forehead on her knees, eyes closed as the tears fell in spite of it all. It was all she could do not to audibly sob with the pain that took her.
Finally, the torrent stopped. The tears ceased to fall, her eyes opened and she kept staring forward. "What do I do? What can I do? I can't...this is so confusing." She whispered to herself. Closing her eyes again she leaned her head back against the tree, breathing slowly and calmly, trying to decide what to do.
"I...I need to push on. The best thing to do is to keep following this path. When I get to the fire nation, I think ahead. Until then, I just need to focus on getting there." With those words she got to her feet and forced herself to continue.
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